The idea that Christians must smooch, speak in soft tones, say nice little things in inferior energy and posturing, like a nice little kid, is very very petty. It is not Christian, nor is it sainthood. Jesus was a very powerful man with a tongue used with great range. He called some vipers, others he woed, some he defamed, others he demeaned. But he did not transgress, because the context ruled his tongue, not petty pseudo Christian inferiority dynamic. It is truly tragic that we as Christians are seen as non Christians when weilding the tongue as a man - not to slander, but to teach, to expose, to reveal the sins of others, and to honor the truth and let it roar like an uncaged lion.
Behold St. John Chrysostom, the golden tongue! He was exiled into Armenia for rightfully demeaning and taking down the empress of his time for disregarding the poor! He was the greatest speaker of all time. But no, let’s imitate the boys, the petty culture of our time, out of fear, not freedom and perfect love, out of shame, not courage, and forget saints, and let us be oppressed by non believer’s ways of expressing their goodness, which comes not from the heart, but from the outer rims of the mind. For the only way non believers can display or imitate goodness, is in fact by appearing harmless, because without eternal life, they are actually out to get you! And that is why they have to appear inferior to be nice, because it is the opposite of their normal baseline way of being - harm. The Christian’s tongue is deemed a threat, because it is free in God. It has the support of eternity, of angels, of seraphim, of lords, of gods, and of saints.